Sunday, December 7, 2014

Celebrate Fatherhood: What to Expect When You Have a Baby | Guestpost by Sebastian, Managing Director

Sakura Haruka is not a blog just about celebrating motherhood. It shares the joys {& frustrations!} of parenting and of families as a whole. Inspired by my hubby's thoughts on being a dad, Celebrate Fatherhood is thus a monthly series where daddies from all walks of life share insights about what fatherhood means to them, and how we can appreciate their role in a family too.

I sincerely thank all those who took the time to guest post for me. Most of those I approached were very supportive and enthusiastic about this new series, sharing my belief that being an involved dad, and getting the dads involved, is important in building a strong family. If you have a story to share, please email me at sakuraharuka {at} live {dot} com.

With a daughter that just turns 8 months old, I am considered a relatively new father. With 8 months of experience into fatherhood, I will say that no amount of pre-natal courses, books or chit chat sessions with other dads can make 1 well-prepared for fatherhood. In my job I have encountered many children, parents and teachers, but all those talks, discussion are mere talks and discussion until you have your baby to hold in your hands.

Here’s my personal list of “What to expect when you have a baby”

#1: It’s love at first sight

Most dads will tell you that the first time they set eyes on their babies, it is love at first sight. And yes, from the moment I set eyes on my gal, it was love at first sight! From the tiny face down to the tiny hands and feet, I can’t help to feel a sense of satisfaction that this is indeed my “production”. The triumphant feeling to hold this little bundle in your arms is immeasurable. And I guess I will never forget this moment even when my little girl grow up to be an adult, a wife and even a mother.

#2: Dirty is never a word in your dictionary

Being a grown-up with a normal sense of hygiene, I used to find kids poo and saliva yucky. But now? Apart from the usual pool of saliva that will linger on my shirt and my arms, I have even started to analyze the poo that my gal pass out!

#3: Baby talks is a natural reflex

Before Chloe is born, I told myself that I will not want to be one of those silly dads who talk to their baby in a baby way in public. However, no matter how many times I have to remind myself that I am NOT the baby, I just can help to imitate and coo at my baby in the way she communicates to us… And at times, I will even take the extra mile to imitate her actions!

#4: You can never maintain the same pre-baby lifestyle

Those late nights at work, going to gym or even overseas trip need to take backseat when you have a baby. Sometimes, it’s just matter of choosing to go back early to spend time with your family or working late in the office.

#5: Murphy’s Law rules

Rushing to get out of the house? Your baby will decide to poo/ cry to milk at the moment. Need to work late after baby sleeps? She will decide to stay up and play a little longer pass her bedtime. Having dinner date with friends? She will be cranky and want to go home… The list goes on….

#6: They grow up too fast

8 months into fatherhood and I am starting to feel that Chloe is growing too fast! Before I know it, she has turned from a little newborn that only drink and sleep to an infant that jumps on seeing you back from work. Sometimes, I can’t help but hope that time will slow down for me to spend more time enjoying every single stages and every single milestones that my gal has achieved.

Fatherhood is indeed a challenging role, but it an enjoyable experience. Apart from seeing the little bundle grows up, my wife and I have also grown up, from a young couple enjoying each other company to a little family with a play gal to take care.

Marriage has its responsibility but I would say there is a significant hike in the level of responsibility that a man or women needs to take from the mere role of a husband or wife to that of a father or mother.

We start to think more before we act, even simple decision like which car to buy, which airline to book have an added layer of consideration now that there’s a dear little gal in our life.

An ex-banker turn entrepreneur, Sebastian is the managing director of JLB Educational Technology Pte Ltd, the company that brought us “Pen Pal Whizz”, the electronic reading system for little ones. He is a guy who enjoys outdoor sports and a workout in the gym. Married to Gwen, they just have a lovely little baby gal name Chloe in March this year.

There really isn't a "baby manual" per se and every parent knows that not everything in the "expert" baby books will apply to us all the time, if even at all! So, it's really great to hear from actual parents themselves who share the real ups and downs that they experience when parenting their own kids. Thanks for giving us an insight into your world as a new-dad to a baby girl, Sebastian! :)

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Masshole Mommy said...

Having a baby for the first time is totally overwhelming. I love your take on it.

An Apel a Day said...

I love that he admits that he talks baby talk back to his baby. They do grow up fast!