Sunday, June 2, 2013

Celebrate Fatherhood: A Year Later

It's been a year since I started the Celebrate Fatherhood series. As I mentioned, Sakura Haruka is not just about celebrating motherhood. It shares the joys {& frustrations!} of parenting and of families as a whole.

About a year back I asked hubby's thoughts on being a dad, and one thing that struck me was how he felt fathers were unappreciated. Of course I understand that's not entirely how he felt and he certainly feels  the joys of fatherhood, but I wanted to explore more on how other daddies felt about fatherhood. Do they feel unappreciated too? What are the common frustrations or joyful feelings? Mothers often have a preconception of what fatherhood is, so I wanted to hear from fathers themselves.

Celebrate Fatherhood was thus born as a monthly series where daddies from all walks of life share insights about what fatherhood means to them, and how we can appreciate their role in a family too.

Fast forward to 1 year and 11 inspiring contributions from fathers later, I wish I could tell you I am the perfect wife who wakes up every morning and makes breakfast for my hubby, doesn't shout at my hubby, sends my hubby love and thank you notes throughout the day, and stoped nagging at him to finish everything on my errand list, but I don't.

It's not that I don't appreciate him, I really do. I recognise his contribution as a very involved parent, and will challenge anybody that says "dads don't do much" or "they don't get it". I'm very thankful of my hubby for helping with household chores {washing dishes, laundry, mopping floors}, spending about 3 hours a day on the road driving around, and yet never giving us a hard time or asking rewards for his important role. He's an amazing hubby and father, and we're really blessed to have him in our lives. 

I'm not a perfect wife with the perfect temper, and honestly, I don't think I ever can be {sorry hubs}. But the thing is, I know that I'm weak in showing appreciation to him, and am trying to show it more, little by little. The important thing is to take the first step and try, right? Some people go through life never realising their mistake and so never change to make things better.

On hearing him say he felt unappreciated, I felt hurt initially as I heard that as meaning to say he felt unloved. How can that be? But on retrospect, I'm glad he said it so that we can work on it, and not let it tear us apart down the road. Also, I may have gone on my usual way if not for the monthly reminders from other dads in the Celebrate Fatherhood series to show appreciation to the boy. I find that from reading their stories, I understand what goes on in a dad's mind more, and can relate it back to how the boy feels and behaves.

Initially, I planned to have Celebrate Fatherhood as a one-year series. However, seeing how it is beneficial to me {and my readers as some have responded}, I'll try to keep this series going on as long as I can. It is hard to get daddies to open up, especially if they aren't bloggers ;p So please, if you want to share your story and motivate me and others, kindly drop me a mail at sakuraharuka {at} live {dot} com.

If you missed any of the Celebrate Fatherhood stories, read them below:

Daddy Winston of Dear Xander: Be The Best Dad You Can Be
Daddy M of the Wacky Duo: The New Avenger - Daddy
Daddy Andy of Sengkang Babies: Birth of a Father 
Daddy Daryn of Phoenix Medical Group: She Never Forgets Her Daddy
Daddy Kelvin of Cheekiemonkies: I Am No Superman
Daddy Phil King of the Household: Life as a Stay-At-Home-Dad
Daddy Ed of EdUnloaded: D is always for Daddy
Daddy Kenneth of Singapore Bike School: Life as a Work-At-Home-Dad 
Daddy Eddie in Bangkok: Give the Old Man's Back a Pat
Daddy Matt Down Under: What It Means to Be A Dad
Daddy Isaiah of JBabies' Dad: Learn to Appreciate Yourself

To the boy, Happy Father's Day in advance and sorry we aren't able to celebrate it together. Lil Pumpkin and I love you so, so much!! Thanks for all your unwavering support and love for us! Muakz Muakz!


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Susan said...

I'm reminded to be a better wife for my hubby too. I'm sure hubby wouldn't mind a post father's day clebration with his favourite girls :)

SengkangBabies said...

Hi Ai,

thank you for consolidating the dads' inputs, really appreciative your efforts :)

Daddy bloggers might appear to be more outspoken, because of our internet presence, but I do know so many more dads out there who are soldiering on for their family.

Andy Lee (SengkangBabies)

Theresa Mahoney said...

I like this series. You are right. It makes me appreciate the efforts my husband puts forth in helping me parent our girls.

Kylie Purtell said...

I am bookmarking this post so I can go back and read through them all. I literally just sent Dave a text message to say thank you for how awesome he has been the last few days while Punky has been sick and I haven't been coping the best. I truly am very lucky to have him, and so is Punky, and I need to tell him more.